a deep dive on self-romance.

i have to talk about this. i have to talk about hope. i have to talk about how it feels when you’re in a constant state of hoping someone would treat you better. hoping they would be kinder. hoping they would value you. hoping they would see you, the way you see them. this is not a weakness. it is a superpower — to be able to hope. to dream. to desire more. but we have to be careful and intentional with it. this is where discernment comes into play.

sometimes we all we can do is smile at the impact that we had on people and move on. at that time they probably really need ed that love and we had it. now we go.

not everybody is meant to stay. no matter how badly we want them to. there’s a lot of magic in never knowing how long we have with people. allows us to appreciate things a bit differently, a bit more intently. we tend to always focus on the future, assuming it’s promised. assuming we have it. when all we really have is now.

back to hope. never lose hope. just re-direct it. maybe our hope in this season doesn’t live in the idea that someone else will treat us better. maybe we hope for other things. we hope to find the strength to move on. we put the hope into our dreams, our goals, our ambitions — back into our life. maybe we hope for more moments where we can pause and appreciate the love around it. maybe we hope for more time to not only do self-love, but to be self love. maybe we hope for the full embodiment of self-romance. we do not lose hope, we re-direct it back to ourselves.

every break up leads you back to yourself and that’s the greatest love story ever. i find that to be one of the most beautiful things about break ups and endings. oftentimes, they start a new beginning. a better beginning. we never lose anything that was meant for us to have. when connections end, allow it to be an invitation to connect even deeper with self. lately i’ve been reflecting less on what i’ve lost and more on what i’ve gained.

more time to self. more time to focus. more time to re-charge. more time to go after everything i’ve promised myself i would do. more time to love on me, and only me.

the re-occuring theme of my life has been who am i uninterrupted?’
without any distractions. without being a people pleaser. without needing any external validation… who am i when the only person to report to is me? what will i do with this extra time and energy?

i saw a tik tok that said the reason you attract avoidant people is because like attracts like. it forces you to ask yourself: what work are you avoiding? what have you been putting off? what are you afraid of unpacking? and most importantly — how can you move through this fear? sometimes people show us exactly what we need to work on and that’s never a loss. always a gain. always a lesson. and it doesn’t always feel like it in the beginning, but it’s definitely a blessing. this shift of perspective allows us to focus on the best thing we can control: ourselves. some people come into our lives and show us exactly who we need to be to get to the next level. remember that.

i say all this to say — may you never lose that hope. may the hope you have in other people be poured back into yourself. into your creativity. into your own schedule.
may we pour into our own cups first. may you continue to be the best love story.

may we find more romance and loving gestures in our inner dialogue. in our morning cup of coffee. in the sway of the trees as we walk by. in the charisma of our breath. may we find the love in every single moment and may we be able to bask in it all.

cheers to finding subtle and kind ways to love on ourselves. i felt called to talk about this today. if this is your vibe, subscribe. i also post on youtube every wednesdays and sundays about holistic nutrition, eating for energy, gut health, emotional eating, books on self-development, growth, transformation — and i live in mexico city so tons of travel content and how i live and adapt to living abroad with my dog in my 30s.

my latest youtube video is: 16 ways emotionally intelligent people process their feelings. we’re reading the book ‘ when you’re ready this is how you heal’ by brianna wiest and it’s a great read. she also wrote the mountain is you which is another one of my favorite books. if you’re looking for a shift in perspective, for more insight into yourself and the light that you are — check those books out. check out my channel. check out my work.

thank you for reading this.
big grateful not the lil one.

-Arielle Simone